04 October, 2013

Moving, slacking, and renewed motivation.

Lots of changes in the last few months. Sold a house, moved into storage and a TEENY apartment.Adeline started school. Bought a new house. Attempting to finish moving into it as we speak.
Decided to do a half marathon in the middle of all this.Yep, I've lost it.

Went on a sewing retreat, which was awesome! SewingSummit 2013 was fantastic. Met new friends, met old friends in person for the first time. Worked out one day while I was there, and learned that 4,000 feet of altitude sure makes a difference on how you feel when you run!

Got home. Fell off the wagon. Hadn't been grocery shopping, so started eating out all the time, or making whatever was easy (nugget and mac n cheese anyone?). Hadn't been working out because everything else was in my face needing to be done. Boxes EVERYWHERE!
Decided that maybe I wouldn't do the half marathon in a month. Until one of my friends asked me about it. Told her I'd inadvertently taken almost 2 weeks off and I was probably done. She told me "NO! You can do this!! You might hurt afterwords, but you CAN do it."

So the for the next month it's ON. I will run. Even if it means (GASP) getting up in the AM early. I will eat healthy. And let's face it, I feel SO MUCH BETTER when I eat healthy anyway. I will do strength training at work. It's a great way to make my runs easier, and I love working out in a group. And I don't lose any time with my kids because it's on my lunch hour!

I will post my race day pics here. You will probably get an update before then! I'm nervous, but I think anyone who does their first half marathon is nervous (or they should be!)

03 July, 2012

What you all consider the best, I consider mediocre.

me·di·o·cre [mee-dee-oh-ker]
1.of only ordinary or moderate quality; neither good nor bad; barely adequate: The car gets only mediocre mileage, but it's fun to drive.
Synonyms: undistinguished, commonplace, pedestrian, everyday; run-of-the-mill. Antonyms: extraordinary, superior, uncommon, incomparable.

If you ever wonder sometimes about the way I do things, why I am so passionate about things, why I am either hot or cold, why I either really like you or really don't, this is why.
I do not have a mediocre bone in my body. It's 100% or 0% with me. Yes, it's hard, it's stressful, and it wears me out. Some days I wish I could be someone who gives less than 100% all the time to everything, but I'm not. If you are still my friend and you have put up with me this long, I love you for it. If you are my family and you have tolerated me this way all my life because you love me, thank you.
And if you are my friend or family, and I call you when I am down and need you, now you know why. It's because I have given every last bit I had to someone or something else and I need you to pick me back up. Love you all :)
And yes, I did write this myself. I only copied the definition from Dictionary.com and am more than happy to give them the credit they deserve.

25 June, 2012


I understand that things are not the way they used to be 10, 20 or 30 years ago when Moms stayed home, Dads worked, no one had student loans, other debt or a ton of other things we all know today.
I understand that sometimes Mom and Dad both work. And go to school. And try to do all the other things that Mom and Dad do. But sometimes, Mom and Dad have to do things for themselves as well.
This is where I get lost. What can I do for me that won't impact all of those around me? Nothing. OK, that's out of the way. So what can I do for me that will still make me happy and is tolerable for the rest of the people I live with? That is what I am still working on.
How can I be a great Mom, great wife, great housekeeper, and still keep myself happy? I am beginning to think it's impossible. Because every time I set a goal for myself, other things come up. Or things get too busy and what gets dropped off the list? Oh yeah, what I needed/wanted to do for me.
I went out of town this past weekend. Just myself. I went to a meetup in Chicago, then went on to Lasalle-Peru area to see a friend I have not seen in months. The whole time I am worrying that J is at home and needs me. Or is going to be mad when I get home because I was gone too long. It's no fun to watch the clock every single min you are gone. For me, that's why it's easier to just take the kids with; that way I don't have to worry that I am ruining someone else's day.
On to the topic at hand. I have not talked myself out of doing a triathlon this year. Actually, the further it gets into the year, the better the idea seems. The largest holdup I have about it is the fact that I need new shoes, and a bicycle and trailer for the kids. That means an initial outlay of probably around $1k. That is a LOT of $$ for something I don't know if I am going to love or hate right away. The other problem is the time commitment. I can take my kids to the Y every night after work, and then we don't' get home until after 8. That makes for a short night. J is in school at least 3 nights a week, and that will not be over for at least another year.
I felt so much better when I was working out three days a week. I was less cranky, less short with the kids and J, and I slept so much better. But now that I am working 5 days a week and SITTING all day, I need it worse than ever.
So how can I find time for me to work out, take care of everyone else and make everyone happy? Question of the century. When you figure it out, let me know.

17 November, 2011

Want vs Need During the Holidays

I have really been thinking about what to do for Christmas this year. I am fairly certain only a few people in my family actually NEED things. Sure, there is always stuff we want, but truly need? Not much.
The kids could use some new shoes. But they for sure do not need toys. They hardly play with what they have.
Jeremy and I? We really don't NEED anything. Sure, there are things we both want. But we don't need anything.
I just have a hard time thinking about all the people and kids with nothing. Nothing at all. In this time of excessive-ness and over-consumerism, it is SO easy to go overboard. Even when there are people in your neighborhood who are losing their house. Or feeding their kids rice and beans, or Ramen noodles, or peanut butter every meal because that's all they have. Or kids that don't have a winter coat, or shoes that fit or are in good repair.

Anyway, I guess my point is, try to give back a little bit. Even if you just buy a $10 coat and take it to your local shelter or church, or if you buy an extra 5 cans of beans, or whatever. Try to do something for others this holiday season.
The kids and I are choosing some ornaments from the Sponsor Tree at the YMCA tonight. And I am going to take the kids and have them pick out the presents, help wrap them and then give them to the desk at the Y. I really hope that by doing small things, I can teach them how to give back to others that truly need things.

02 November, 2011


It has been a long time since I have been here and a LOT has happened.

Job changes, life changes, family struggles. Lifestyle changes. The kids are getting big.

I am going to focus on the positive. A year ago this month, (give or take a couple weeks) my BFF Jess said to me "You really should start drinking Diet Coke". Fairly certain I looked at her like she was CRAZY. In the course of the next month, I started counting calories, watching WHAT went in my mouth, drinking Diet Coke! and started training for a 10K. Which at the time, I thought was a totally unreasonable goal.

Fast forward to May of this year. I had lost over 20 lbs, Jess had lost more than that! and we ran the Original Mud Run!! A 10 K with over 79 obstacles, all in the woods, MUD and water. We were NOT in it to WIN it, we were in it to FINISH it, which we did with flying colors. It was a fantastic day that we shared with friends and family.

I am shocked that I have stuck with this lifestyle change for a year. I am still going to the gym at least 2 days a week, sometimes 3 or 4, and running on at least one other day. You are talking to someone who had never run more than an 800M dash in her LIFE. And that (I thought at the time) was pure TORTURE. I am now doing Zumba for an hour twice a week, doing strength training 2 days and running 3.5 miles another day.

I have gone from a size 10-12 pants to a size 4-6 pants. I am wearing a medium shirt. a MEDIUM! And sometimes that is too big. I am stronger than I have been in a LONG time. I have more energy, I have more patience. I also have a renewed outlook that ANYTHING is possible if you put your mind to it.

My new goal for 2012? A sprint triathlon! I am focusing on strength training this fall and then starting the hardcore swim training in the spring, and then adding biking. Hoping to FINISH in August. I also have some body fat percent goals that I am working on and hope to get stronger as well.

I would never have thought any of this was really possible a year ago. I thought my days of being fit and not fat were over after having 2 kids 15 mos apart. Come to find, I just needed the right people in my life to push me and support me and be there for me and to find the place in myself where *I* knew I could do it.

Thank you so much to Jess, Jeremy, Kelly E, Robyn, and ALL my other friends and family for sticking by me, telling me I looked great, helping me learn how to push myself again and loving me no matter what. The only regret I have? Not taking before pictures!!